All About the NBA

After watching the NBA all-star game festivities this weekend, I realized two things:

1. The NBA has the best all-star weekend in all of sports because their weekend showcases the NBA's athleticism and the "competitive" portion of this weekend actually is entertaining. Through the dunk contest (won by Los Angeles Clippers' big man Blake Griffin; more on that later) and the skills competition (won by the Golden State Warriors Stephen Curry) fans get to see the athleticism and skill of players in isolation without the role of rules such as traveling (wait? they already don't call traveling in the NBA?). And although most of the actual all-star game is a school-yard, ball-handlers game (note the obscene amount of ATTEMPTED alley-oops) the last five minutes of the game are usually very competitive and you can tell that winning/losing means something to the players. No other professional sports league can pretend to claim those two things about their all-star weekend.

quick slam-dunk contest/Blake Griffin point: I like Blake Griffin's game and his ferocious dunks on SportsCenter are always a treat, but he didn't have the best dunks in the competition. This dunk contest was more of a testament of Blake's increasing popularity (like Justin Beiber winning the MVP of the celebrity all-star game) as the media and fans just handed over the trophy when the other contestants went out there and truly performed more impressive dunks.

2. I have still not written an article about the state of the NBA union. For those that have been paying attention to the NBA, the state of the union is strong (with the obvious exception of the looming breakdown over labor negotiations between the league and players. Without the NBA, my sanity is up in the air; to the the rest of the world: you have been warned). This league is brimming with talent (young and old) at virtually every position and parity is up (despite the presence of a handful of juggernaut teams), ensuring a more entertaining visual experience for fans and commentators alike. That said, there are only a handful of teams and players that have dominated the story lines thus far. Here's a quick run-down of teams (we'll have a post about players later this week) that have mattered the most in the 2010-2011 NBA season:

Teams:

Los Angeles Lakers (38-19, 1st in Pacific Conference, 3rd in Western Conference)

The reigning two-time NBA champions are never one to shy away from the spotlight. This year the Lakers have had their usual amount of controversy (Ron Artest's woeful shooting, Kobe calling out teammates, Phil Jackson/teammates calling out Kobe, to name a few) but it has been followed by an uncharacteristic amount of losing. The Lake Show have had their first 4-game losing streak in the Pau Gasol era as well as a handful of 3-game losing streaks. Kobe's freshness during the all-star game, particularly his repeated drives to the basket (he attempted almost a dozen field goals inside of 6 feet, making 8), came as a welcome sight. Despite the escalating difficulty of their schedule,  look for the Lakers to start playing more consistent basketball as we get closer to the playoffs

San Antonio Spurs (46-10, 1st in Southwest Division, 1st in Western Conference, Best Record in the NBA)

Inexplicably, Father Time has overlooked the Spurs as the 4th oldest team (weighted by minutes played, thanks hoopism.com) has jumped out of the gates and not looked back. With perennial all-star Tim Duncan playing below his lofty standards for much of the season the Spurs have been able to amass the best record in the NBA doing what they do best: paying attention to detail and playing "within" themselves. Head coach Gregg Popovich has this team working hard on both ends of the floor (never a surprise on defense, but their offense has been more potent than in past years) and every Spurs player knows his role. I think the Spurs will start to rest their players for the playoffs as their stranglehold on the best record in the NBA is all but complete

Boston Celtics (40-14, 1st in Atlantic Division, 1st in Eastern Conference)


Boston are playing like the San Antonio Spurs-Eastern Conference Version. Their methodical consistency on the defensive end combined with the great playmaking from their "Big 3" and point guard Rajon Rondo are a tough combination to beat night-in and night-out. The Celts are the unquestioned favorite in the East and all competitors in the Eastern Conference know that the road to the NBA finals as the Eastern Conference representative goes through Boston. Especially this next team...

Miami Heat (41-15, 1st in Southeast Division, 2nd in Eastern Conference, Brangelina like media coverage)

The Heat trio of LeBron James, Dwyane Wade (not a mis-spelling, that's how he spells his name) and Chris Bosh have received an un-real amount of scrutiny this year with the Carmelo Anthony trade saga a VERY distant second as far as NBA news print is concerned. After starting the season 9-8, the Heat have banded together to go 32-7, including winning an NBA season high 21 games in a row. In fact, their record might have been more impressive if not for each of the "Heatles" (the self-styled nickname of Miami's "Big 3") missing at least one game and important role players like Mike Miller and Udonis Haslem missing significant time. Now that they Heat are rolling, they know what they have to do, beat Boston (they are 0-3 in 3 tries this year...or they could hope that Boston is upset in the early rounds of the playoffs. I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for that scenario to happen) if they want to battle for an NBA championship this June.

With no offense to other teams having a great year (the Oklahoma City Thunder, Dallas Mavericks, Chicago Bulls, Orlando Magic to name a few), these are really the only 4 teams that have a chance to win the 2011 NBA championship. Barring injury to important players or another unforeseen disaster, I expect these teams to be the NBA's "final four" in a couple of months. I haven't settled on a favorite out of these teams (other than my irrational bias for the Lakers telling me that they are the best of this bunch) and it will be exciting to watch the final third of the season develop.

What excluded team do you think has the best chance of crashing this "final four" bracket that I have presented?

VY's Texts - Jeff Fisher Edition

Soon after Jeff Fisher and the Titans parted ways, Onions got in contact with VY through his preferred medium of communication, text messages. We are sincerely sorry for delaying get this up. Here is a transcript of our texting.

Onions: So what do you think about Jeff Fisher leaving the Titans?
VY: VY conquers all h8ers. Mustache man be hating the VY so Buddy kicked him out.
Onions: Are you coming back to the Titans?
VY: VY is the elite qb everyone be looking for. VY better than Brady and Manning and old man Collins. VY can win a Super Bowl with a team full of VYs.
Onions: Do you have a team you want to go to?
VY: VY wins. Look at the Rose Bowl tape. VY is greatest player ever.
Onions: We hear you have a new project outside of football?
VY: VY got a new show on the Longhorn Network: VY and the Rose Bowl
Onions: What happens on this show?
VY: VY talks about the Rose Bowl and best Rose Bowl player ever, VY. We got 20 episodes and probably more.
Onions: So 30 minutes of you talking about your Rose Bowl performances for 20+ episodes?
VY: VY talks for an hour with gust appearances of Jamaal “I’m Jaaaaaamaaaaaal” Charles. Old Man Mack wanted to talk but I told him to hit on other people’s mommas elsewhere.
Onions: Thrilling. What other ventures you doing?
VY: VY be grilling right now. Come to VY’s Steak House in the Capital of the World, Austin. VY grills steaks like Mack did for my mama. That be why I came to Texas.
VY Sends Picture Message:

Onions: Thanks Vince? You have anything else to say?
VY: You be wasting the VY time. Time to hit the Patron and make it rain in this club.

Super Bowl Shuffle

No we're not the 1985 Chicago Bears, but we ain't here to cause no trouble, we're just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle

The Special One and Mr. Miyagi have decided to team up to break it down really funky this week by combining to do a Super Bowl Preview. The Special One is live on the ground in Dallas and has some breaking news (told you we are credible journalists), up-to-the-minute info about the game.

The Special One (TSO): I'm here at Highland Park High School because this rich kids high school is the only place with indoor football practice facilities in the city of Dallas (Well done Southern Methodist University and Dallas Cowboys. How do these two not have indoor practice facilities? Oh wait. The Cowboys have a good excuse...) and I'm happy to report that the snow and ice are melting

Mr. Miyagi (MM): That's fantastic, cities in the south like Dallas are less equipped to take on the snow than Michael Jackson was for parenting (too soon?).

TSO: No kidding, downtown Dallas and the freeways between Forth Worth and Dallas are open, but no one is reporting this because outside of those areas it is still covered in ice and snow

MM: This why the Super Bowl must ALWAYS be played in a warm weather city...

TSO: Odds-makers in Vegas have the line at Packers -3, you think they are 3 points better than this Steelers team?

MM: On a neutral field that happens to be in a dome? Yes, the Packers should be the favorite. If they had played their same schedule in a dome like an Atlanta or New Orleans (and hadn't had so many freak injuries), this Packers team might have had a 14 win regular season

TSO:  I don't disagree that this Packers team can score at will, the Steelers might have the right defensive scheme and personnel to keep them in check. Polamalu is back in charge of that D and he is making big plays. Also, don't sleep on their incredibly fast receiving core

MM: IF anyone can slow down this Packers team, the Steelers have the best shot, but Polamalu is hurt. Right now, the only thing Polamalu is head and shoulders above is dandruff. Aaron Rodgers will be sporting the "championship belt" all night long

TSO: Lets not count out the Steelers offense. Big Ben is back and hitting his receivers. He doesn't go down and blows past any defense. Mendenhall ran all over the Jets D. This offense is capable of keeping up with the Packers if the D gets some stops.\

MM: Roethlisberger is more hype than substance in the postseason. Obviously, you can't discount his 2 Super Bowl wins and playoff win-loss record, but this is a guy with a career playoff rating of 85.4 (not stellar) and 17 TDs to 14 INTs. He's going to make mistakes on Super Bowl Sunday and will hurt his team.

TSO: As I said, if the D makes stops, they can be in this game. The O-Line could open up some holes for Mendenhall and get that running game going. Sure Pouncey looks to be out but this is a well coached team. Well coached teams minimize their mistakes and take advantage of others. Who doesn't want Blade (Tomlin) to coach your team.

MM: So what do you think the Packers have to do to win?

TSO: The Packers need to come in and be the team that wins in dome games. I think the game comes down to the secondary. Can their DBs handle the speed that is Mike Wallace and Emmanuel Sanders in addition to Hines Ward? If they shut down the receivers make Roethlisberger to force it, then the Steelers are in big trouble and the Packers win. What do you think the Steelers have to do to win?

MM: I think they need to turn the Packers into a one-dimensional team. Packers running back James Starks had that great game in the Philadelphia win and hasn't been as explosive since. If the Steelers can force Packers QB Aaron Rodgers into having to make EVERY throw and be responsible for EVERY first down, they may be able to get the turnovers they need to win. We've gone through how each team can win, but who do you think will win tomorrow?

TSO: After all of that, I have to take the Packers. That offense in the Jerrydome should be unstoppable unless Jerry hates Wisconsin.  

MM: I have to agree, the Packers are the best team in this game with all that they bring to the table on offense AND defense. Packers LB Clay Matthews lost the Associated Press Defensive Player of the Year Award to Troy Polamalu by 2 votes (he should have won in my humble opinion, he played the whole year whereas Polamalu missed a handful of games/was hurt and ineffective in others) and the Packers defense will be the story of the day as they repeatedly harass and make life difficult for Big Ben. I'm picking Packers by 10.

T$ Trys Fantasy Basketball

Hey Onion! heads (new name for readers, give it a try, it'll grow on you), after years of protest, we finally convinced T$ to play fantasy sports online. He's in our fantasy basketball league and he wrote about his experience so far. Here is T$'s take on fantasy basketball/sports:

What’s the first thing you think of when you hear fantasy basketball? Nerdy young men checking their computers all day long? Jocks huddled around a plasma watching the NBA on TNT? Blake Griffin leaping astronomically high to slam it home?

After having some reservations, I decided to bite the bullet and partake in my first fantasy sports experience. I was hesitant at first, weary of both time commitments and the notion that I would favor the importance of individual statistics over the aesthetic love of the game and my beloved teams, the Golden State Warriors and San Antonio Spurs. I bought into a league formed by few college friends not knowing at all how to ‘play’ fantasy basketball.

My fantasy basketball experience was rocky from the start. I missed the draft due to work commitments and was stuck with a team that HAL 9000 had chosen. Even the NHL all-star game captains had a chance to choose their team!!! I decided to persevere through my robotic squad, conscience of the fact that I had sacrificed the equivalent of $10 (tortoise shelled Vans sunglasses) to matchup against such fantasy heavyweights as ‘Pat Summit's Pussy,’ ‘DICK SMASH’ and ‘Wax On Wax Off.’ Luckily I had managed to snag Monta Ellis of the Warriors and Manu Ginobili of the Spurs. The libertarian of fantasy basketball, I chose to maintain a ‘hands off’ policy in terms of my squad. Bad idea. For those that don’t know about fantasy basketball, the Yahoo Sports edition, each week one team is matched up against another. Statistics from NBA players playing in actual games during the week are compiled and compared to an opponent’s players/team for that given week. 9 statistical categories are tallied, ranging from field goal percentage, turnovers, total points, rebounds, blocks, assists, steals, free throw percentage, three point field goals made and free throw percentage. Balance is key, as wins in the actual fantasy league are determined by each statistical matchup win. One can win 6 categories to 3, losing in the points, rebounds and assists column but winning in every category.

Eventually I was able to spend more time managing my team, trading some players to build a more balanced team. I had to sacrifice Manu for the assists and steals of John Wall and the all-around game of Lamar Odom. Even though I still have players like Andre Iguadala, I’ve also added to my roster exciting players like DeMar DeRozan and Andrew Bogut. I went from last place in my league to 6th place, the final playoff spot after deciding to concentrate some time on my roster and lineup each week.  Fantasy Basketball can be a daily chore, but the hour a week or so of determining who starts in your lineup keeps you aware and interested in the NBA all season long. I have a new appreciation for the League coupled with a hobby that I share with my friends. The trash talk between fantasy league owners is anther bonus that my immature friends and I also enjoy. Basically, fantasy basketball and I have a Carl Weathers – Arnold Schwarzenegger relationship.  I will definitely play fantasy basketball gain in the future, just don't expect me to commit to fantasy football or fantasy jai alai!!!