Don't get your hopes up, kids...

Coming into this weekend, I was very excited about 3 inter-conference showdowns. For a long-time follower of college football, these games all had strong historical relevance and to spice up the games, all of these teams were currently ranked in the top 20.

The last time Miami and Ohio State played each other was in the infamous 2002 Fiesta Bowl where Ohio State profited from one of the worst calls in the history of sports and ended up winning 31-24 in 2OT. (Yes, I'm still bitter. In fact, I'm going to continue drinking bitter beer and have my bitter beer face on as I write the rest of this post)

Florida State and Oklahoma last met when they played for the 2001 BCS National Championship (Oklahoma won 13-2) and more recently this game starts a home-and-home for the Seminoles and Sooners with the Sooners traveling to Tallahassee to face the 'Noles in 2011.

Lastly, Penn State and Alabama haven't played each other in decades. But way back in 1978 these two teams played in the Sugar Bowl for the National Championship (Alabama won 14-7). I didn't think all of the games were going to be extremely competitive, but I expected the road teams to at least show up and have more self-respect than Tony Montana in front of a mound of cocaine...

Instead 2 of the 3 games were complete laughers and one of them might've held my interest if Miami's star quarterback, Jacory Harris, didn't make a habit of throwing it to the other team. Let's name the culprits from this past weekend:

• No. 1 Alabama climbed on top of No. 18 State Penn Penn State after they dropped the soap and won 24-3. Penn State's only points came in the 4th quarter  
• No. 10 Oklahoma dropped a bomb on No. 17 Florida State in a 47-17 game. Honestly, the score wasn't that close. FSU scored 10 of it's 17 in the 4th while Oklahoma added a field goal.
• Lastly, No. 2 Ohio State beat it up like gorillas when they faced No. 12 Miami in the Horseshoe. They won by a comfortable margin (36-24) but this game was close for most of the first half with Miami holding the lead twice in the opening 30 minutes. And then Jacory Harris made it rain interceptions...

(I was tempted to include a link to the Fat Joe's "Make it Rain" video there, but I decided to exercise self-restraint. Wait, I don't know what self-restraint is, grab your umbrella here)


Part of the problem with these inter-conference games is that they featured two ACC teams (Miami and Florida State). For those who don't know, the ACC is the conference of hipsters. Apparently, no one cares about winning. Check out some additional ACC results from this past weekend:

• No. 13 Virginia Tech lost to Division II JAMES MADISON in their home opener. I asked a friend to come up with some reasons why this would happen, but then his head exploded. Needless to say, I didn't try to come up with any analysis after that happened.
• No. 15 Georgia Tech tasted defeat after losing to previously win-less Kansas on the road. This is the same Kansas team that lost 6-3 against North Dakota State. I challenge readers to 1. find North Dakota on a map and 2. make me give a damn after doing so.

So after going 0-4 this past weekend, what's the deal with ACC? Let's see how this works out in the Gimme Some Onions! Court of Law:

• Prosecution: The ACC was favored in two games (Georgia Tech and Virginia Tech) and underdogs in the two other matchups (Miami and Florida State). At a minimum, they should've gone 2-2; 0-4 wasn't even part of the plan because JAMES MADISON and KANSAS were on the schedule.
• Defense: 3 of the 4 games were played on the road in tough environments (@ Ohio State, @ Oklahoma, @ Kansas). Ok, so maybe @ Kansas isn't a tough road environment, especially now that Mark Mangino isn't stalking the concessions guy sideline. Either way, home crowds have a way of juicing  the home team, kind of like Ron-Ron Juice...
• Ruling: The ACC is severely overrated and is going to get beat like a red-headed step-child when they play any school that is serious about winning football games. I suggest the ACC start entering it's teams in less competitive sports, like the Hipster Olympics.